November 2011
13 posts
oh no! Would-be assassin Oscar Ramiro Ortega has a beard. Will this affect MY beards popularity in the polls? Let’s all pray together.
RT @curlycomedy: Whenever I get lonely on the road I cheer myself up with, “At least I don’t live here.”
this morn. @CalliaRiden heard Sandusky deny the charges on the radio and said, “If I ever met him.. well, I’m just glad I know the F-word.”
TONIGHT @ 9pm @CorporateJugger Presents: @RoryScovel at @BongoJava http://t.co/AmsmTFnC !!buy tix online in advance.. this WILL sell out!!
RT @BRADBRADBRAD: Comedy tonight at the Bellevue Pub 8:00 me and funny people and booze
Downloading the Love’s truck stop “ultimate drivers’ app” so I can keep up with my reward points and know when I’ve earned a free shower.
RT @splangy17: If people loved Jesus half as much as they loved football Catholics would’ve showed up like these penn state students. #f …
ATTN: all rappers (and anyone else, for that matter) who “can’t stop” and/or “won’t stop.” Please reconsider.
RT @Tennessean 200,000 rounds of #Memphis Police ammo missing. tnne.ws/rYsyPc // It’s MEMPHIS! I’m sure a good samaritan will turn it in.
RT @superpixels: @ChadRiden I don’t think HerpesSimplexIIPops are gonna fly off the shelves, chief.
NOTE: I did not use the phrase “stiff competition” in my previous tweeteroo about jizz because I like to keep it classy.
I normally hate the “fall back” time change but I’ve been looking forward to this one forever - now the clock in my car is right again.#lazy
RT @LeeRoyDiggler: @ChadRiden something something Andy Rooney complaining about his own death! HAWAHAWHAW!
October 2011
16 posts
It is great. http://t.co/DkR8SEfd
RT @ScottBartell ask away #seo // is there an easier way to get SEO bots to auto follow me on twitter than by asking for SEO advice?
W/ Al Jackson tonight at @zaniesnashville at 7:30! Call 6152690221 to reserve (up to 4 ) FREE tickets! Mention the e-mail special
RT @nsup: also announcing NEW show starting 10/30: @ChadRiden’s “SmartyPants Stand-Up Comedy Show” @ Steve’s in East Nashville :: http:/ …
The Incredible Hulk got @BrianBatesComic hands for Christmas. #BrianBatesFacts
somebody here is blasting George Michael’s “Careless Whisper” on their ‘puter speakers. I officially give up. You win, world of sucky things
another video I shot earlier today at the @OccupyNashville march http://t.co/GOuJX45V #OccupyNashville #SuckItCorporateAmerica #LaResistance
iMay just be iParanoid but iThink iCloud looks a LOT like .Mac with a new name.
I’m really happy with where my beard is right now. all of my hard work is finally starting to pay off.
RT @Anundson I would love to learn more about this. // What would you like to know, friend?
I wish Craig Mack was still kickin’ new flava in my ear. I liked that one flava in 1994, but that’s not quite as new as I like them to be.
Is Ricky Martin STILL living la vida loco? It seems like that’d get old after a while and la vida aburrida would be a welcome change.
I just got my BEST podcast shout-out ever on this show: RT @comedypodcast Happy Birthday Gary – Episode 41 – Lee vs Lee http://t.co/tHicfp3s
I used to work somewhere that had a LOT of meetings about meetings. I would look around wondering why nobody else thought it was hilarious.
OMG #BreakingBad
Just realized the “contact” form on my website has been shooting emails into oblivion for months.. I’m not just ignoring YOU (well, maybe).
August 2011
7 posts
Phone lines are open! Now taking requests on the hotline: 615-829-6187
Spent most if the day bagging, boarding and boxing stacks of MAD Magazines. Get in line, ladies! #efil4dren
saw a woman on all fours tapping a neighbor’s window & talking to their dog.. but I was wearing pajama pants so I’m still the weird one.
RT @danschlacter @ChadRiden is that short for a certain room with brown walls and jars of candy? // my butt-hole, yes.
RT @tnlive Total voter turnout was 19.71% // About what percentage of those people are retirement age goofs with nothing better to do?
Flippity flu!
Very disappointed to find that both “Steve Guttenberg fan club”s on Facebook seem to be disingenuous. You morons just don’t get it.
July 2011
4 posts
The more you talk about how important music is to you, the higher the probability that your favorite music sucks.
RT @Henlips: Anybody in Nashville? If so, I’m doing my own show at Zanies tomorrow night at 8pm. Come down! www.zaniesnash.com
RT @DruncleSam: SchlAAPPY (BURRRRP!)thDAYYYYYY tehhhhhh meeeeeeehh!!!!! AAAAAPEEEE biiiiiithhhhhhhdaaaay toooooooooooOOOOOOO mmmmmmeeeeeeeee
This lady keeps calling red skelton “red skeleton” as she tells me how much she loved him.
June 2011
7 posts
RT @TheTallJessica: @ChadRiden and you almost snagged a hot piece of ass…ok, lukewarm, but still. #beggarscantbechoosers
watching @janettemccurdy battle-rap on @nickelodeontv. Why, what are YOU doing?
RT @CalliaRiden: I made a YouTube video. I hope you like it. Tell me if you want me to make more. “The Girl That’s An Alien” http://t.co …
i will not be impressed until my car can just wake me up when we get there. http://t.co/QssCbLP
My brother Eric is the only person I know who could be (and is) totally pissed off about avocados. I feel the same way about chipotle.
Driving my car in or out of my garage makes me feel like a low budget suburbanite Batman.
Horrible Reasons to Read: Dan Harmon's Story... →
whetzell:
A lot of pilots come and go at 101. Any given audience longs for a story, they expect a story and if you don’t give it to them they will feel cheated and/or unsatisfied. I’m not an expert at story but I like to follow these bullet points even in my one minute “Everything” segments. The following…
May 2011
9 posts
ATTN NYC: I will be all up in you as soon as Thurs. Prepare for my arrival by stockpiling the best beef jerky and the cheapest cheap swill.
in honor of Mother’s Day, today I’m telling everybody I see to tuck in their shirt, stop slouching and pick their clothes up off the floor.
RT @RySing: we’re about to head to Chicago if I can wake up @BillyWayneDavis , @TSimmonsComedy and @ChadRiden in this hotel after crazin …